I have grown to understand that my life is not my own. It belongs to God. I recall my love for God developing at a very early age. I remember wanting to praise Him from the depths of my soul. I wanted so badly to be like the mother’s of the church who buckled over as if in pain because they felt the presence of the Holy Spirit so deeply they couldn’t stand up straight. I didn’t fully understand what they were feeling at that time but I knew that they loved God in a very real way, and that their praise was genuine and not for show. It will be a great many years before I will know God’s presence in my life like women such as Mother Beala, or Sister Louder, but I rejoice, because I have always felt God’s covering over my life.
Through hardships, some by my own doing and some not, God has been exceedingly faithful and my JOY has remained. One of Kirk’s favorite songs is “I Wont Complain”, the best part of that song to me is, All of my good days outweigh my bad days, I wont complain.
Psalm 30 is a powerful text that I really relate to. My enemies have never had opportunity to gloat over me. I know it’s hard to believe because I am so sweet and lovable, but yes I have had an enemy or two in my life. Also, when I ask for help God is always faithful to heal my circumstance. Not in my time but in His time. I truly trust that God knows what’s best for me, and I refuse to settle for anything less than God’s best for me and my family and friends. Truly I do not know how to settle for less, when I serve a God who sent His only son to die for the sins of the world. That is why as Israel Houghton says in his song “I Will”, my REASONABLE response is to PRAISE Him. He has been far too good to me.
Now, I know life hasn’t turned out the way many of us hoped it would so far, notice I said so far, because God is not through with us yet! Just be thankful and rejoice that life hasn’t turned out as bad as it could have, and be committed to trust and wait on the Lord.
Through sadness, abuse, sickness, and loneliness, REJOICE, rejection, broken families, sexual assault, resentment, and as my mom used to always say, robbing Peter to pay Paul, REJOICE!
I WILL rejoice, for God’s love, grace, and mercy leave me no choice. My reasonable response is to praise Him!
And when people look at me and make assumptions without knowing my story and think that in some way my journey has been easy, I shall count it joy, for the Glory of God’s kingdom shall shine.
