Location

As I sit at the bus stop in route to the airport to get home from Sacramento I am in a wonderful state of calm. The bench that I currently occupy sits facing what I believe to be Capitol Park. It is filled with trees and in the distance between the periodic passing of a car I can hear the most poetic conversation between birds. In this moment I ponder if the geographic location of where we call home is the primary culprit of ones habitual discontent. I dare not suggest that the hustle to meet our daily obligations is bad, I simply encourage you to walk a little slower, notice the magnificent landscape God has created, and take the time to smile and offer a heartfelt hello to your fellow man or woman. Be blessed!

Gold

As my son Malik tried to convince his brother and I that he could contend for an Olympic Gold medal in events ranging from the 200 meter backstroke to the 200 meter sprint (he probably could if he set his mind to it), I began to think. I love that he was speaking from a  perspective of life that is still full of possibility, full of hopes and dreams. And while to a certain extent I know he was exaggerating and joking, there is much truth in what he says. I believe that with love, and a balance of guidance and support from me and their dad, both my sons can and will reach their greatest potential in life.  


As each Olympic Gold hopeful is waiting to compete, NBC has done a wonderful job of showing just how much time and effort the athletes have committed in preparation for this one moment in time. The chance to realize a lifelong dream. The story and montage of photos are filled with the joys that began as early as 5 or 6 years of age, and also includes the sacrifices each in the family has made to make the dreams a reality. 

What stands between or contributes to each individual and their greatest potential in life are the following: unrelenting support, focus, hard work, fear of failure, and the inability to weather the storms of disappointment (finances are very important as well, but we'll save that commentary for another day). 

1. Unrelenting support - no matter what the biggest narcissist might think, no one accomplishes great things in isolation. Whether it is family, a mentor, educator, coach, or friend, someone along the way provides the challenge and the support necessary to propel you forward. 

Who stands by you when you want to call it quits or you feel like the cost for your greatness is too high? Who's the one who encourages you to push through and continue? Who is it that you can trust to never stop believing in you? Who will not give up on your dreams even when your belief lapses. Those who come to mind are your unrelenting support system. If you are a parent, hopefully you are all these things for your children.

 

2. Focus - once you identify the activity that brings you challenge and great enjoyment, Commit to it. Why settle to be good at most things when you or your children can be great.

3. Hard Work - Plan for it! Even the Greats work toward what they want. Natural talent and ability can only be enhanced through blood, sweat, tears, and frustration.

4. Fear of Failure - One of my greatest challenges. Fear is like my kryptonite. But, I do know that FAITH (trusting that the unimaginable and intangible are possible through God) is necessary. I recently decided to begin surrendering my fears.

5. Disappointment - It will come...and sometimes linger...BUT...it too shall pass! 

What are you hoping for? It may be too late for some of your hopes and dreams, but there are many possibilities still available. It is time to surrender your fears, get focused, and start living life actively. Your greatest self awaits!

Withdrawal and Silence

Withdrawal and silence may be a wonderful coping mechanism for some. It allows one to not confront or ponder their true feelings about a situation or circumstance. And while this approach may be less combative, this approach can wreak havoc on interpersonal relationships and communication.

WITHDRAWAL allows one to hide, while SILENCE does not necessitate the need for one to verbalize their own truth.

Both can create more noise than a Winter's night filled with unimaginable thunder and lightening. They allow for the offender to harbor and fester in disdain for the happenings around them without having to take responsibility for ones own feelings.

WITHDRAWAL/SILENCE leave those closest to the offender filled with doubt, uncertainty, insecurity, confusion, and resentment.

Who or what have you withdrawn from? Is silence screaming at you?

Stagnation

What is the cause of holding patterns in our lives? Are they the result of our lack to be proactive and move? Or, do they come as an opportunity for God to speak and for us to be still, silent, and listen?

I suggest that it is a combination of both! What has God spoken into your heart that you are paralyzed with fear over? I'm clear on what He has spoken to my heart. I've decided to be obedient and move in FAITH. What about you?!

I guarantee it won't be easy, but it will definitely be worth it.

Rejoice!

I have grown to understand that my life is not my own. It belongs to God. I recall my love for God developing at a very early age.  I remember wanting to praise Him from the depths of my soul. I wanted so badly to be like the mother’s of the church who buckled over as if in pain because they felt the presence of the Holy Spirit so deeply they couldn’t stand up straight. I didn’t fully understand what they were feeling at that time but I knew that they loved God in a very real way, and that their praise was genuine and not for show. It will be a great many years before I will know God’s presence in my life like women such as Mother Beala, or Sister Louder, but I rejoice, because I have always felt God’s covering over my life.  

Through hardships, some by my own doing and some not, God has been exceedingly faithful and my JOY has remained. One of Kirk’s favorite songs is “I Wont Complain”, the best part of that song to me is, All of my good days outweigh my bad days, I wont complain.

Psalm 30 is a powerful text that I really relate to. My enemies have never had opportunity to gloat over me. I know it’s hard to believe because I am so sweet and lovable, but yes I have had an enemy or two in my life. Also, when I ask for help God is always faithful to heal my circumstance. Not in my time but in His time. I truly trust that God knows what’s best for me, and I refuse to settle for anything less than God’s best for me and my family and friends. Truly I do not know how to settle for less, when I serve a God who sent His only son to die for the sins of the world. That is why as Israel Houghton says in his song “I Will”, my REASONABLE response is to PRAISE Him. He has been far too good to me.

Now, I know life hasn’t turned out the way many of us hoped it would so far, notice I said so far, because God is not through with us yet! Just be thankful and rejoice that life hasn’t turned out as bad as it could have, and be committed to trust and wait on the Lord.

Through sadness, abuse, sickness, and loneliness, REJOICE, rejection, broken families, sexual assault, resentment, and as my mom used to always say, robbing Peter to pay Paul, REJOICE!

I WILL rejoice, for God’s love, grace, and mercy leave me no choice. My reasonable response is to praise Him!

And when people look at me and make assumptions without knowing my story and think that in some way my journey has been easy, I shall count it joy, for the Glory of God’s kingdom shall shine.

Line in the Sand

Does your soul have a price tag? My kids, Malik and Amir, love to play this game where they give me these ridiculous circumstances of life and ask me if I would do or experience certain things for a certain amount of money. For example, for $500,000 would you eat someone else’s vomit? Or, for $10,000,000 would you give up the gift of one of your five senses like sight, or hearing. While this game sometimes can be a bit daunting because they love to present me with the most insane and unimaginable options for the most astronomical amounts of money, it does cause one to explore this notion on a more realistic level. When I think of the state of our world, nation, and more specifically our cities, it begs the question, what amount of money causes one to turn a blind eye, or ignore the convictions of ones own conscience (assuming they have one)? 

In my professional experiences I have witnessed many individuals become oppressors of the very one’s they seemingly were advocates for as they pursued higher salaries. In most cases the higher salary came directly at the expense of the one’s they claimed to advocate for. I am in no way suggesting that seeking greater financial compensation is wrong; I too enjoy the finer things of life that only money can buy. However, I believe that when it comes to life's essentials: food, shelter, education, health care, and safety, my Soul has a line that is drawn in the sand, and I have decided that there is no amount of money worth crossing to the side that causes other’s to suffer and go without for my own selfish gain. My conscience will not allow it. Sadly, the people I mention before who were chasing after money, they also articulated the belief that they would never cross that line either. 

What about you? How much does your line cost to cross? Or do you even have a line?

Not Buying It!

So, Hollywood doesn't green-light or financially back movies that can't bring in big dollars and doesn't have an overseas market. Really? Is that a fact.

I understand the need for George Lucas to be politically correct in his interviews about his new movie Red Tails. He may want to make other movies in the future so he might want to stay on the right side of Hollywood bigwigs. But, can I just say, come on...I'm not buying it. Last time I checked there were plenty of movies with all White casts that bombed at the box office. Yet films such as those continue to be made and distributed. That being said, the theory that it's all about the box office money that can be made doesn't ring true. How many times have you been in a movie theater during the coming attractions and thought "who gave the go ahead on making this film". As a person with great love and interest in film I am deeply bothered that I can always count the number of starring actors of color on one hand; and sometimes it takes no hands at all because there are no shades of pigmentation to be found. I remember last year having to turn off the Emmy's because it was so homogeneously White I became dizzy. And Im not just talking about the nominees which is always the case, I am referring to the audience as well.

Now, let's get to the real. It is easier to attribute the lack of support for films that spotlight actors of color to dollars and cents than it is to attribute it to the real culprit...good old fashion RACISM. I know this word makes many uncomfortable. It's like the pink elephant in the middle of the room. Everyone knows its there but no one wants to talk about it. However, I think our inability to have honest dialog about race makes us incompetent of its power and effects. Race is one of the greatest determining factors of power, respect, earning potential, and prestige in our global society. It also continues to be a factor for the way in which people are perceived, gain educational and professional access, and advance in ones aspirations. Sadly, it is also the means by which people are oppressed, marginalized, victimized, and forgotten.

Media can be used to address the pink elephant. That is what I believe George Lucas is doing with his new movie Red Tails. He stated that he was not making a film about victims but one about heros. He chose to make a movie that naturally will cause people to confront the ways in which they think about race. Conversely, media can also make one believe that the pink elephant does not exist. Film and television are the greatest perpetuators of racial stereotypes. Mass media is the medium where status quo seeds are planted and nourished. Then underrepresented and underserved people get to watch the status quo continue to grow. The issues George Lucas faced working to get Red Tails made is not a new struggle. I posit the issue is not that making a film with a predominantly Black cast can't make money, but more so, that telling stories like Red Tails cause American's to confront truths about this nation, historical and present day. Furthermore, positive stories and images of people of diverse cultural backgrounds allow people to see that all things positive in this country did not and do not begin and end with White individuals.